Run by your man (or woman)

Running with your spouse or life partner is a great way to connect, but it can also be challenging at times. I came to think about this when Frank and I were running in Vienna a couple of weeks ago, during a weekend visit. I had not been running for a while, and we did twice 10 km in the mornings there. I found it pretty tough, although the locations and the scenery were great for both sessions. Unfortunately it turns out to be hard to get back on track after a break, although I had been constantly training in alternative ways. For me it was great support to have Frank during these two runs, but I am afraid the pleasure was mostly on my side. I was simply whining and complaining all the time! Poor Frank was extremely patient and motivating, and I did apologize and make it up to him afterwards. But this experience made me think how I sometimes allow myself to be quite childish when I am with him, whereas I never do this with other people.

Fortunately it does not happen that often (although Frank might have a different opinion). You might remember that it did happen when we were training for Bergen Fjellmaraton, and I remember clearly the very first time it happened, when Frank was teaching me downhill skiing almost 28 years ago. I was falling all the time, and of course it was all his fault! Our friends from Melkesyre keep asking him whether I am always so cheerful; well now you know the answer... Perhaps it can be compared to how our children sometimes behave when they are with us and when they are with other people. Since I learned everything about outdoor activities (hiking, skiing, running) from Frank, he is in a way my parent in this respect. Or might it be that when you are with a person whose bond to you is rock solid and will not be affected by a little whining, you allow yourself to be a bit spoiled from time to time?

Running together can have other challenges as well, but those can be easily turned into enjoyable games. Frank is faster than me, but that is not really a problem when we are running together. If we want to run fast, he can run faster and come back, and repeat this until the end of the course. Or we run at a pace which is moderate for me and slow for him, upon which his gps watch becomes very happy and congratulates him with a restitution run! All these years we have been training for Stoltzekleiven together (also with our sons when they were younger and easier to convince to go with us), and on such short courses it is really easy to make up fun games. For example, I can start a few minutes earlier and he can catch me towards the end; the later he catches up with me the happier I am, which gives motivation for both of us to go faster.

After a few months of hesitation Frank finally has now fully joined Melkesyre as well, and that allows us to train at maximal strength together.  Our Melkesyre friends are at various form levels, and we each have people we can compare ourselves and try to keep up with. Frank was a competing athlete (ski jumping and cross country skiing) when he was younger, and since many years he has been the coach of several football teams for boys. I am not sure whether this is the reason, but he was a bit reluctant to join organized training activity as an adult. However, after he joined Melkesyre and Varegg trainings, his form improved so much that he is now even more eager than me to go to training sessions. We have a weekly schedule of doing the Saturday Melkesyre intervals and Tuesday Varegg intervals together. This week, for the first time he even joined the Thursday Stoltzekleiven training (but that was only because his own football training was cancelled that day).  Although we did a few competitions together outside of Stoltzekleiven, like Bergen City half marathon and Bergen Fjellmaraton, he was not as eager as me in 2014 to join a lot of races. This is also changing now, and I suspect that he will participate in many of the racing events of this year.

Frank jokes to say that he had to join Melkesyre; otherwise he was afraid I would become faster than him. I think it is rather that he realizes that I am serious about running and competing, it is not something that will pass quickly, and he wants to be a part of it. He is always very supportive about everything that I come up with (I do come up with a lot of things some of which are a bit crazy), but he has been particularly great about all the things I tried for getting rid of the pain. "You just go and do your stretches and exercises, I will cook", he says, or "You just go and rest, I will take care of this". I am so grateful and amazed that he can be so sweet and patient, whereas he says he is impressed and proud that I do not give up and I continue to run.

Today we booked our tickets for racing together in Italy in October!